May 2025

Trump orders reopening of Alcatraz for ‘America’s most ruthless and violent offenders.’ Look at it this way: It’s GOTTA be cheaper than flyin’ all those assholes to El Salvador. He can take some of the billions of wasted dollars DOGE’s findin’ to modernize and harden it, and turn it into the Supermax Prison of the West. Who knows. With the new improved Alcatraz in view as a constant reminder, maybe the wackos of San Francisco’ll straighten up and fly right.

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